I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
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