i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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