hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
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My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
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