You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
