at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Life is so much better after having sex.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Randomize