Please, let me fuck your mom
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I think people are normalizing furries
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize