Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize