You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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