Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
