that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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