His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
