Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
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