i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
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