I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize