i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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