So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Man, jail baloney is awful.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Randomize
