I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize