No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize