Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
