i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
