the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
