dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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