would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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