but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize
