i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Randomize
