Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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