Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
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