Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
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