make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
