ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
