Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
