she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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