Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
