every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
