id be glad to
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
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