hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Holy shit dude........stairs
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