Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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