I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Randomize
