I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
