dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize