i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
