you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize