I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
