East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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