Your tits are I can't wait for
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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