He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Randomize
