i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Randomize
