Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Success! We fucked roommates!
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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