Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Randomize
