I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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