I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
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