so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
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