Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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