Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
